Beloved
by divinedisorder
Summary: something old, something new, something borrowed


Beloved

by janis

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some traditional ideas. more non-traditional ones for christianity. human bashing, for once. lucifer portrayed as non-devilish. this counts as a biblical fanfic, it quotes the bible. i'm pretty sure i'm going to piss everyone off with this one.

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Judas Iscariot's body hung from a tree, the noose no longer swung the body, it was dead still.

It's lifeless bloated eye stared at everything and nothing. The other eye had been pecked away by a roaming bird.

It's face still had the expression of anguish on it, it's tongue hung out from it's mouth and stinging flies hovered over the body, knowing where the was decay there was food.

Then Judas Iscariot saw a figure walking towards him. He grew numb with fear as he realized he could see.

Judas Iscariot was dead.

The figure was dressed in white, it seemed young. It moved closer.

Judas Iscariot was dead.

He could see the figure had long black hair.

__

He was dead

Judas couldn't tell what gender it was.

__

Wasn't he dead?

The young figure smiled, holding out a slim hand out to him. 

"Who are you...?" It was his voice, Judas realized, he could speak again.

The figure smiled, a beautiful smile. "You know me." 

He shook his head, amazed he could do so, the noose was gone. 

The figure walked towards him, ethereal and beautiful. "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart..."*

"The... the words of Jeremiah..." Judas' gasped, his eyes widening as he stared into the eyes of the being. The being's eyes were a deeper blue than the night sky and while Judas' beloved Master's eyes were honey brown, color did not matter. Compassion, gentleness, justice, and love swirled in their depths and radiated with empathy. The eyes were the same.

"... Rabbi?" Judas uttered, he became weak in his knees and dropped, kneeling to the ground. _(This cannot be.... Jeshua is dead... I...) _He felt vertigo. 

"Yes." Came the musical voice in his ears and arms wrapped around him. His body was pressed against the being that held him, his eyes closed and lost in a incredible warmth and sensation. The being had no gender yet... never, not even in bouts of passion, had Judas felt so whole.

"I killed you..."

"I let you... I knew what you would do long before I was your Rabbi. I knew. I always knew." The voice of the being cooed like a mother to it's child.

"You are.. you are the son of the Adoni?" He looked up to the beautiful face, neither man or woman.

"I am Mystery, I am the unpronounceable one, I am the Beloved." 

He felt his blood run cold, how funny to feel that, since he was dead. "I have... done... something unforgivable." He adverted his gaze away from the Beloved's eyes. 

"Do not," The Adoni began in firm yet gentle tone, however nothing could question the authority and steel spoken with those words, "Do not __ever__ tell me who is or is not forgiven in my eyes. I am the only one to judge that."

"I have forgiven you, my dear child." The mystery continued. "I know you grieved for your mistake and tried to pay the ultimate price. You gave yourself judgment..."

"No, not that My Lord!" Judas cried, burying his head on the being's chest and sobbed like a child. "I _KILLED_ you!"

It smiled. "I forgive you, Judas. Come home."

The former apostle breathed in as a wave of acceptance flowed through him and his Adoni took him home...

***

The seraph arched a fine golden eyebrow with a look of complete disdain on his fine features. Gender was next to irrelevant in the realm the seraph resided in, it was more of a mark of identification rather than body type. The seraph preferred being a male, it gave him a feeling of respect. The seraph's gaze was focused on a small pool before him that allowed the angel to watch over any event at any time he wished. The angel smiled a thin bitter smile and glanced up to his companion. "Why does he do it?"

The companion, a regal looking 'woman' with long black hair and silver eyes, frowned at him. "You know the Adoni does not care to be refer-"

"__He__ has become __man__ so many times one beings to wonder why." He responded, raising his hand over the pool of water, making the image of the Beloved embracing it's killer fade into waves. 

She sighed. "If the Adoni came down as a woman, she would be discredited by mankind."

"Figures, doesn't it Lalia?" The seraph chuckled softly "You'd think our Beloved would given in. It burns _him_, he burns with sorrow when humans do something like that."

"I wonder why the Adoni puts up with you, Satan-el."

"The title? Really, Lalia, I despise being called by a title rather than my name. Titles don't mean a thing." 

She look his statement into consideration. "Lucifer, I am new to having the privilege to speak to you, why does the Adoni put up with you?"

"He wants to prove me wrong, Lalia."

Lalia did not need to ask what, that much was known. Lucifer adored the Beloved, his adoration would never be questioned. He would never leave the Beloved's side. But he disagreed with one thing. 

Humans, the Beloved's most... unique creation. 

No angel loved a human, except those who went to obverse and protect the misguided beings. Angels pitied humans. 

Humans seemed half formed, imperfect, and had a violent curiosity. And other times they could be mistaken for an angel, they could be at peace with themselves, their past, their deeds, and was beyond condemning manner their brethren adopted. 

Damning. Unquestionable justice? Unquestionable vengeance. The word spewed out so easily, the word lacked truth. 

Lucifer hated humans and to his amusement, the humans seemed to hate him too. They did not know him, of course, but the Beloved had once sighed about this new entity, this 'Satan' who wanted to be ruler of Heaven so he was banished from Heaven into Hell. 

Hell. Lucifer would of been too delighted if that reality existed. Punish humans, their pettiness, their greed, their 'logic'. Wipe them out and never have the Beloved be hurt by them again. If becoming the father of sin, the do-er of evil, would take the burden from his Beloved, then Lucifer would gladly do it.

But the Beloved... the Beloved, loved them. Despite the constant rejections, despite the sinning, despite putting the blame of their hardship on the Beloved, despite creating a new entity to blame them for their own weaknesses, despite of being denied; the Beloved loved them.

How many forms did the Beloved take on? Vishnu, Buddha, Aditi, Horus, Gaea, Mithra.... countless more. Why? Because the Beloved believed all could be saved. if they weren't, the souls would have another chance in another life time, if not then, then in another. And the Beloved would reach out to them, somehow.

And humans... yes, some were coming back to home.

Others... others denied the Beloved's existence, or call the Beloved cruel.

"So funny Lalia, you know how many human cultures are materialistic... in general they seem to be like that."

"I've noticed..." The lower ranked angel answered.

"They're so proud of their existence, their actions, their inventions, their achievements."

"What are you trying to say?"

"I wonder why Humankind denies their greatest achievement, they're so eager to claim everything else."

"What?"

"They created sin, they created suffering, because they rather wallow in self denial rather than admit they're the cause of it."

Lalia said nothing.

The Beloved returned.

The seraph Lucifer, the Satan-El to Humankind, turned to meet his Beloved existence in joy.

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Quick References

* Jeremiah 1:4-6

Lalia: Angel of the womb/night

Satan-el: "Adversary __of_ _God" Of meaning belonging to. Lucifer is considered the Adversary of God towards Humankind in this story. The title has been given to him by angels. 

Adoni: "The Lord", a term that's used to address the 'name' YHWH. It sounds prettier than Yahweh.

Aditi: Obscure Mother-God deity in the Hindu pantheon. I might be wrong about this. _*apologizes with a cookie to Hindus reading this fic*_

-

*sits politely waiting to be charred to a crisp* 


End file.
